On the first day of camp, I had a headache and despite taking Panadol, it did not go away. Before the programs started, me, Caleb and Matthew prayed together for camp and for my headache. But as we started praying, I realize that the pain went away, we also prepared our hearts through that prayer.
At night, there was a dialogue session with Pastor Jeff. And even before the dialogue, during dinner, Pastor Jeff was really intentional to talk to each of us and know us. I gleaned from him that Intentional Love is key, just as how God pioneered in his love. As we pioneer and move in love, God will move in his love too. He also shared that Teachability is very very important even when we become leaders or even pastors, for that is how we can continue to grow, and continue to be humble to acknowledge God and those he appointed. The last thing I take away would be the importance of having a sustainable rhythm of work and rest. so that I can rest well and keep serving God till the end of time.
When the 1st day ended, I had a time of spontaneous worship with other brothers and sisters. And we even harmonized and mixed songs together. We also keep singing Forever forever (literally) with mash up and harmonizing. For some reason, I couldn't fall asleep that night. I lie on my bed for hours before falling asleep at 5am. And then woke up at 7 for my 2nd day.
On the 2nd day, we had a series of workshops after breakfast. The workshops were Teaching, Worship, Facilitation and Leading the Opposite Gender. I learned a lot during Teaching workshop, as the pointers that were shared broaden my horizon greatly. There is no need to prepare new teachings all the time, existing ones are fine, and what is truly important is to make it relevant and applicable to the group. When I share about something to improve on I can point to my mistakes, and when I am sharing something good, I can affirm somebody. Conclusion is key as it is where people apply and respond. Ultimately, it is God who moves and people don't just look at the teaching but how you live your life. There are many other valuable pointers too. The Opposite Gender workshop wasn't as applicable, but it was enjoyable. It taught me how to relate and help girls without crossing lines. And it also helped me get a better picture the God-given roles of guys and girls.
We went to service afterwards, and my mum joined me on that day. There were many young people so she was uncomfortable, but she was still blessed. I was blessed too, just by coming to Church together, as it is one step closer towards serving God together as a family with one heart beat. She will be connected to the 2nd service teacher LG or the adult group soon. Also had a great fellowship dinner with Zion at Old Changi before heading back to the camp site. More fellowship to come :)
When we were back, we were supposed to sleep early. But we(the guys) celebrated Douglas' Birthday in the dorm, we suddenly had an open session of sharing. I was really encouraged to see how each of them are just.. guys, but by God's grace we are here today. This is just as what our camp shirt writes, "By the grace of God I am what I am, worked harder than all, yet not I, but the grace of God that was with me." -1 Corinthians 15:10. Really really excited to run the rest of the race with these brothers-in-arms. I got the picture of rogue soldiers, different yet united with camaraderie :)
Now its the 3rd day early morning, I was probably the last one to fall asleep again. It was already 12.45am. I still couldn't sleep and also had a bad toothache. I kept pondering if I should go to the Hall and ask if a facilitator can pray together for me. Just before I decided to get out of bed, I chose to say one last prayer to Jesus. To my surprise, the toothache just faded away in 1 or 2 minutes. I fell asleep shortly after. Little did I know, all of us would be turned out half an hour later. If I did went to the hall, I might have found out the facilitators' and ULs' plan to turn us out soon.
It's 1.15am now. I was so blur that I initially thought it was 5am. We had a series of activities prepared for us by the facilitators and ULs. There was one where we had to melt an ice with our hands in order to take the paper with a bible verse out and then memorize it. We really want to treasure God's word as our treasure and hid it in our hearts. Another when we carried a teammate across a stretch to signify the weight of supporting and spurring one another on in this race. My hands (and idk why but even my legs) are sore now. I barely exercised over the past few months and I was surprised that I managed to carry the person all the way, I guess God gave me sufficient grace even in this activity itself.
It's 1.15am now. I was so blur that I initially thought it was 5am. We had a series of activities prepared for us by the facilitators and ULs. There was one where we had to melt an ice with our hands in order to take the paper with a bible verse out and then memorize it. We really want to treasure God's word as our treasure and hid it in our hearts. Another when we carried a teammate across a stretch to signify the weight of supporting and spurring one another on in this race. My hands (and idk why but even my legs) are sore now. I barely exercised over the past few months and I was surprised that I managed to carry the person all the way, I guess God gave me sufficient grace even in this activity itself.
It was a really memorable night, and despite having only 2.5h sleep in camp thus far, God helped me to be awake. At the end, we created a poster together. It has Lamentations 3:22-23 on it, which is about how God's love is steadfast and his mercies renewed every morning as we watched the Sunrise. We also had a session of P&W during the sunrise :)
We slept for a few more hours before having a great catered lunch from Peachy Western Stall. After which, we had a time of ministering. As we worship, we sang the song You Chose Me and responded to truly lay our lives down for God. When Tim Yeo asked who wanted to respond by kneeling down, I knelt, and I believe almost everybody did. I couldn't see, but Tim started to wept, and I was also moved and cried in the grace of that moment. When we can just come before God to give our lives to him, by his grace.
It wasn't really a struggle for me to respond, because I have set in my heart to submit my life to God till he returns. My true struggle was how I will live my life each day on from here, how am I going to love my father, my army section, my extended family, the needy I see, my LG. And also, how can I manage my time, to help my mum in her work, in loving people, in loving my LG, and other important things. I need to renew my mind each day to offer my live as a living sacrifice to God in worship. I need his love to overflow in my life each day. I need to firmly believe that I can consider all things a loss compared to the surpassing greatness of knowing Jesus Christ. I need to hold on to his Kingdom and righteousness, and know that he will provide. Today, I am on my birthday off so I am at home. I'm just blogging right now, but no, I do not want to remain stagnant. I want to go out to love somebody, I want to share more about Jesus, I want his Kingdom to touch the world. Keep this flame burning Jesus, move in your power and your love Jesus. I also remembered Pastor Jeff words, "You will always struggle in your journey to serve God and lead, if not you are not serving God. For God will not call you to do something in which you will not need to rely on Him."
When the leaders prayed for us, one prayed for me that I will really be a channel of God's love to those who need to know it, to help people to see how much God loves them, even if they are unlovable. Another prophesied the call of Jeremiah on me, from Jeremiah 1:4-10&17-19.
The word of the Lord came to me, saying,“Before I formed you in the womb I knew you, before you were born I set you apart, I appointed you as a prophet to the nations.”
“Alas, Sovereign Lord,” I said, “I do not know how to speak; I am too young.”
But the Lord said to me, “Do not say, ‘I am too young.’ You must go to everyone I send you to and say whatever I command you. Do not be afraid of them, for I am with you and will rescue you,” declares the Lord.
Then the Lord reached out his hand and touched my mouth and said to me, “I have put my words in your mouth. See, today I appoint you over nations and kingdoms to uproot and tear down, to destroy and overthrow, to build and to plant.”
“Get yourself ready! Stand up and say to them whatever I command you. Do not be terrified by them, or I will terrify you before them. Today I have made you a fortified city, an iron pillar and a bronze wall to stand against the whole land—against the kings of Judah, its officials, its priests and the people of the land. They will fight against you but will not overcome you, for I am with you and will rescue you,” declares the Lord.
I was convicted yet quite frightful when this was prophesied over me; especially the part where God says" I have put my words in your mouth. See, today I appoint you over nations and kingdoms to uproot and tear down, to destroy and overthrow, to build and to plant." This signifies great influence, one where I may even face persecutions from many but stand by God. But wait, this is the 21st century, and I am just a private in NS. In my wildest imaginations, I still can't picture the kind of influence that is. I am also reminded of having "Furious Intentional Love", one that people would find so unusual, one where I can even share the gospel boldly and pray for the needy, some may scorn at me, but this is furious intentional love.
Some restructuring will happen in the NS ministry, and I don't yet know how God will use me or the other brothers. But God, I am willing, use me. I don't know how, I'm weak, I can't imagine, but you will carry the good work you began to completion. And you have already SEAL-ed us for the Day of Redemption. Thank you also for presenting to me this Certificate of Comissioning from SEAL Camp on this 1st of June; just before my birthday today. I am reminded of Job 1:21 "Naked I came from my mother’s womb, and naked I will depart. The Lord gave and the Lord has taken away; may the name of the Lord be praised.". But thanks be to Jesus, that even if I "lose all things", he still adds unto me. I am not naked, I am a conqueror and I have you Jesus!
"I am royalty, I have destiny, I have been set free, I'm gonna shake history."-Jake Hamilton, The Anthem
Over the past month, God kept speaking to me through what Paul said "I consider all things a loss compared to the surpassing greatness of knowing Christ." The more he speaks to me, the more it resonated to me. It was spoken through Desiring God book, through my devotions, through Conference, and this SEAL camp. The key words are not all things a loss, but compared to the surpassing greatness of knowing Christ. I can experience more of the Kingdom of Heaven on Earth, I can have such intimacy with Jesus, I can see souls receive salvation, and God's grace abounding and more. I leave you with this quote; what are you living for?
"Our greatest fear should not be of failure, but of succeeding at things in life that don't really matter."
-Francis Chan, Crazy Love
You Make Me Brave God. And I just love this Worship Album. The songs are personal intimate heart cries and heart responses to God.
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