Testimony of Paul

As I quickly reflected about Paul’s life and ministry on Earth. I realized that He always give thanks, rejoices and exalts Christ, even though he faces numerous hardships, countless rejections and persecutions, even stoning, shipwrecks and whipping.

In my life, I am glad for the grace of God in my life, and it’s because of it, I am who I am today. Because of Jesus, I am no longer condemned, I am set free and changed. From someone who’s socially awkward or even autistic, I spoke up more through the assurance and love of Christ, to even let others know His love. From being self-centered and spoiled, I want to live my life on Earth for others. And even in my studies and future work, He leads and guides me. For my family and friends, I am blessed. For this fellowship with Him and His Word, I am blessed. For even extraordinary testimonies, like healings and knowing and witnessing the salvation of this brother, Etienne, I am blessed.

I still get anxious daily, especially in things like providence, would the CPA Internet Biz work out? There are practices that I do not want to adopt as they are of the flesh. Yet I am “losing out” because people are looking to these methods. And when I go to SMU Biz, how will my future be mapped out from there? I do not want to be self-seeking in Biz at others’ expense, I do not want to adopt bad practices in Biz. My current funds to do CPA are almost out. But I still remember that miraculous day, that I was spending more time just to seek God, and to share with my mentee that I do not want to adopt bad practices in CPA. Then just before I slept, my earnings of $146 in 3 weeks suddenly became a total of $434, almost tripled!! Well, thereafter, the results I’ve got makes me uncertain about what I’m doing again.

But then, I look to Paul. He has learned to be content in whatever circumstances, knowing what it is to be in need or have plenty. In every situation, he can do everything through Him who gives him strength. And what more, to him, to live is Christ, to die is gain.

In his ministry, which was literally his whole life, God performed many miracles, brought forth many deliverance, and lead him in the Spirit. Don’t we want these miracles, these guidance and deliverance, and this favor? But then, this grace is already yours! God poured these things in Paul to build up the early Church extraordinarily and that was Paul’s delight. For Paul says, “If I am to go on living in the body, this will mean fruitful labor for me. Yet what shall I choose? I do not know! I am torn between the two: I desire to depart and be with Christ, which is better by far; but it is more necessary for you that I remain in the body.”

I do not want to lose sight that I’m here to love people and to give God glory before He returns. So in my life, when I do not have answers to my uncertainties, like with regards to providence and course of work, when there are challenges, let me know that it is nothing to do with whether God favors me. Rather, let me rejoice that I am in Christ. In as much as we suffer with Christ, we are also glorified with Him. This life on Earth is but like a moment outside the Pearly Gates of Heaven, for when they open, we’ll be with God for all eternity. Therefore, whether CPA will be just an experience or an area to steward, it is not of much significance. While I do have to steward my finances well, what’s more is for me to bring the gospel people, and to love those who are in need.

So while I am doing CPA, and am going to Uni. Let me know, these things are not what I live for, like for real. Just as Paul said, “If anyone else thinks he has reasons to put confidence in the flesh, I have more: circumcised on the eight day, of the people of Israel, of the tribe of Benjamin, a Hebrew of Hebrews, in regard to the law, a Pharisee; as for zeal, persecuting the church; as for legalistic righteousness, faultless. But whatever was to my profit I now consider loss for the sake of Christ. What is more, I consider everything a loss compared to the surpassing greatness of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord, for whose sake I have lost all things. I consider them rubbish, that I may gain Christ.”

For I am a co-heir in Christ, a Child of God. & what father, if a child asks for bread, will give him a stone? So therefore, let me too live my life more and more for Christ, just as Paul lived his whole life in dedication to Him. I thank God that my grandma and aunt will be coming for Mandarin Mother Day’s Service with me and my mum. May I continue to love them, and may they experience more of God’s love. And may I remember everyday, that I live in His love, and I live to love, for His glory :)